A Snooki Situation In Hoboken

I had gotten a text late on Saturday night that my friends David and Stacy were at one of my favorite spots, Louise & Jerry’s (329 Washington St, Hoboken). It was about 11:45PM, so I had expected the usual drunken hoards we get when school is in session.

What I didn’t expect was the shear multitude of tall guys with t-shirts two sizes too small, gold chains, greased hair and enough cologne to choke a moose hunched over short girls with too much makeup and hairspray in high heals and low-cut fuck-me shirts. At least I did not expect them at Louise & Jerry’s.

Don’t get me wrong, my problem really isn’t with who drinks where. Everyone has the right to drink wherever they want. My problem is how some people treat others around them.

If you bump and spill someone’s drink, apologize. If you need to maneuver thru a crowded bar, walk sideways and say excuse me. And for fuck sake, do not use your ass to push someone else off a barstool (I’m not kidding, some girl tried this).

Saturday night I witnessed such a wide range of aloof rudeness, I just could not believe it. There is just no excuse for that kind of behavior. The lack of courtesy in life has not just gotten out of hand, it’s now considered cool.

Is it me or is anyone else concerned that kids are learning social etiquette from shows like The Jersey Shore featuring sociopaths? Getting drunk and having fun is one thing. Getting drunk, acting like a douche, and thinking that’s what you’re supposed to do is another.

Nasty arrogance has replaced simple politeness. And it’s all because society places losers they see on television onto to gilded pedestals turning them into ludicrous role models

Of course I’m happy for the fact that the bar is doing well, but can we learn some civility please. The skinheads I hung out with in Newark twenty years ago showed more manners and acceptance than these brats. And they really didn’t have to.

One thing that came out of this was a set of replacement terms for the worn out ‘Guidos’ and ‘Guidettes’. Now we can say ‘Snookis’ and ‘Situations’.

As a favor for the lazy, I decree that a group of such characters can be described simply as ‘A Snooki Situation’. You’re welcome!