My next flight was thankfully on a much larger A-320. As I took my seat, my neighbor offered me his seat by the window. Though I like peering at the scenery, after that last claustrophobic flight I preferred the aisle seat. Settling in I noticed that United was calling them Ted for this leg. I guess they were trying to be hip and cool low-budget airline. It just sounded a bit silly to me.
The girl making announcements on this flight was a trip. She had us all laughing although I was not sure if it was intentional. Some of her quips included, “Please turn off all Blackberries, Blueberries and anything else you have with a berry in it,” and “Please make sure your tray and seat back and seatbelt is fastened.” I had to think about that one for a second.
She ended her speech with, “Welcome to Miami, gracias,” even though we had not yet even taxied to the runway in Washington DC. She cleverly covered it up with, “Soon we will be in sunny Florida, howdy.” The laughter from this changed to groans when I realized that they were charging for snacks on this short flight. At least the coffee, tea, pepsi and water were free.
Once in Miami
The Super Shuttle ride to the hotel was a bit of an adventure but a very good deal if you’re traveling alone. It’s $20 per person to go from Miami Airport to South Beach. If you have one or more travel companions, take a taxi. That will cost a total of $35 with tip. Of course the cabs know where their going which is a big selling point. Our van driver seemed to be rather confused once we arrived in South Beach. I think I would have been better off paying the extra $15 for a cab.
The girl to my far left named Aliyah asked the guy next to me whose name I forget what he was doing in Miami. “Absolutely nothing,” he replied. He was from Long Island and here to party with some friends. She was running away from work and stress. I chimed in to say how cool and somewhat surreal it was for the three of us were all from the North East and all in Miami for essentially the same reasons. As we watched our driver make several u-turns searching for each passenger’s destination, we made plans to meet later that night. Sadly, because our trips were all so short, it never happened.
At The Palms Hotel South Beach
Once I settled in to my room at about 3:00 I thought that, since Helen wasn’t getting into town until around 8:00, this would be a good time to get some work done. Despite my ability to skip off to Miami on a whim like this, I still had work to get done. The beauty of my state of self-employment was that I can literally work anywhere. And believe me, I can think of worse places than this to work.
I found a quiet spot out on the veranda with a nice cold beer and powered up my laptop. I did take the time to torment a couple of friends back in NYC as I soaked in the warm ocean air. When they’d ask me, “How’s the weather in Miami,” I’d answer, “Oh it sucks! It’s warm and sunny. There’s a breeze coming in from the ocean. Thank God there are no unbelievably hot women here.” Which I’d follow up with a mocking, “ha ha!” They were not as amused as me. My next beer helped me to get over it.
On to Ocean Drive
I’m happy to report that I was able to get a considerable amount of work done by the time Helen got to town. We made our way to Ocean Drive in search of some much needed food. If you’ve never been here, well let’s just say it’s all pretty cheesy. Loud, bright, smoky and chin deep in pretty people. It was harder than I expected to decide on a place. That is until I looked inside Mango’s Tropical Lounge which is a massive neon rain forest complete with a waterfall.
Initially we wanted to eat outside. That is until we were lead to our seats on the curb. I mean literally on the curb. Mere inches were between me and the grills of passing Hummer limousines. We opted to pay the $5.00 cover to eat inside. I was impressed by the low cover considering the look of the place. After this came a comic routine that could not be written any better. First we were told there were plenty of tables inside. We paid our money and followed one of the hosts up to the second floor.
On the walk up, he informed us that there would be about a fifteen minute wait. That is unless we wanted to eat in one of the back rooms. He escorted us into a room that was pumped full of flashing lights, overly loud pounding music and lots of smoke. We told him no thanks and that we’d wait the fifteen minutes. Then he said we can eat at the bar if we’d like. Not that I minded the scantily clad women dancing on the bar, but I felt it would not make a great place to eat. So again we told him we’d wait.
