Watch as my life spirals into control
Not really being into Halloween makes it kinda easy for me to stay in. I was invited to a couple of parties, but decided to not go. Rather my intentions for today and tonight were to stay in and write. Instead I’ve found myself sleeping or sitting like a vegetable in front of the tube all day.
I’m not a happy camper right now. On top of that I actually found myself saying, “If I did this to deal with my lack-luster creativity of late and to kick my ass into productivity … and it’s not working … why not just go out and get faced tonight?” I have to wonder if I’m just continuing this to prove I can make it thru thirty days. Or is it still for those reasons more deep. Health, career, spirit, etc.?
I find myself more and more making plans for after November 8 and getting nervous butterflies in anticipation of that first night out. Maybe this was a bad idea … or bad timing anyway. No I’m not gonna cave, but I hope my attitude goes back to what it was when I started. Instead of this growing stress I feel each day.
