After all I really don’t like being alone. But in the last few months, I seem to be going out of my way to by myself. On nights when I have no events to attend, I simply stay home, eat and lounge on the couch watching CSI, Star Trek, Fairly Odd Parents or whatever. Ignoring the phone and email.
It would be different if I was being more productive with my time. Maybe writing about those events, sorting thru my pix for the site or penning the next great novel. Instead, before I know it, 3:00 AM creeps up and the sedentary induced insomnia kicks in. Legs ache, back aches and anxiety burns the heart and gut.
Some of those closest to me have a hard time understanding why I’m like this. In their defense so do I. I mean, here I am right now late at night trying to write about it yet still zoning out to the hum of the TV in the background. George Clooney on Charlie Rose. The new Ridley Scott FBI drama NUMB3RS earlier. Spongebob should be on somewhere at sometime soon. Hey why is Jimmy Kimmel wearing a tie?
Adult ADA perhaps? I never believed in that stuff before. I feel that everyone is distracted these days thanks to all of our personal entertainment technology and incessant multi-tasking. But not everyone is this crippled by their distractions. Do the answers lie in pharmaceuticals? God I hope not. I’m not a big fan of that kinda stuff.
I’ll just go back to drinking on a regular basis. After all I’m a happy, social drunk. In all seriousness I’d still like to believe that I can somehow turn this around to my advantage. Use my time more wisely and all that jazz with my own self as the catalyst.
