Watch as my life spirals into control
Last night after getting home from the Goldhawk, I fell asleep on the couch and had a very strange and disturbing night of dreams. The first dream found me at a party in a place I’d never been to in my real life. It was one of those places that not only feels real in our dream state, but is amazingly familiar. You know all of the rooms in the building or curves and bumps in the landscape.
In this place I had successfully thwarted off invitations of beer until I accidentally picked up a cup and drank it down. In a horrified moment I realized I had blown my challenge. Crying with my head in my hands, I was trying to figure out how to explain this. What a fool I was. How could I fail like this? Then, quite suddenly, I woke up panting with my heart pounding. I was disoriented but finally thankful that this was only a dream.
When I fell back to sleep, I dreamed that I was walking around my town cutting my hair with the buzzer I normally use. In reality I had just buzzed my hair the day before. Once again I woke up. This time I was not so anxious. Rather I was amused at this dream.
But for the third time around came the oddest of all things. A repeat of that first dream. This scared the hell out of me because, in my dream state, I was aware of the first dream and said, “No! This has to be real this time! I already had this dream!” Oh the relief after I woke up. Well more accurately after the panic of wondering if I was finally awake wore off.
My stress level is obviously higher than I had realized.
